Hey, guess what, it’s been a friggin’ WEEK! 🙂 Got your dose of soo withdrawl (ironic sentence haha)? 🙂
Yes, I am smilin’ and alive, listening to this crazy African pianist who can do whatever crazy stuff with his right hand while his left hand unflinchingly repeats this chord pattern, over, and over, and over.
I felt a sudden urge to write or communicate in some way or form, listening to this evocative music.
My life these days – I am inclined to say “this semester,” but I am probably stuck in a perspective of now which is making me brand all of the past 3 months as bland one, so I will just say, “these days” – seems as though it were floating about in a vacuum cylinder, or as though I were a small molecule floating in a test tube full of water and carbon dioxide. Or water and milk, milk and clear tea. It’s foggy, grey and liquid where I see or sense nothing, maybe just hear a few moist cool misty noises, feeling in a strangely content but rather unconscious way. It’s mostly cool mist. I feel as though this might be how I might have felt in my mother’s womb. Water, darkness that doesn’t feel all that dark since I am not aware of it with my closed eyes, or eyes that have not yet opened once, and I am floating about. It is Chaos – I don’t know where I am going, nor do I feel any control over where I am going either, and my wants and needs seem vague and distant, but not necessarily in a languid, lackadaisical lugubrious way but mostly in an unaware unconscious way. Maybe I should start writing something. Time for a real, long story? Will it perhaps give me some meaning and want and direction. I feel like writing in a diary but it feels strange and unfulfilled. I would like the privacy of writing in my diary, but I also want to be read, but maybe by a specific reader (or readers) – I hope you don’t assume too many things from the last few lines that I have just written because these are things I cannot quite fully explain.
(Such are the limits of expression through language.)
Language. Notes. Impressions. Captive. Expression. Now? Now. Cognition..
Eh let’s move ahead, through this grey amorphous mixture, cool wet mist and through no-time,
and I’ll get YOU guys some links to interesting articles, soon, perhaps this weekend, which is pretty soon, yes?, yes.
Smiles all around in all directions like the sun rays, guys. Sunflower.